Sienna. At the prearranged time, my taxi stopped at the address of the apartment building of the Italian family with whom I was going to spend my first week in Italy.
It was a rocky start.
Marcella bounded down the stairs, grabbed my suitcase and practically threw it over her shoulder as she motioned me to follow her.
She and her husband had been farm hands in an Italian vineyard before they retired at age 65 so working hard and lifting hard was a nothing for her.
A smile was more difficult.
I didn't speak a word of Italian but I had brought along two dictionaries: English to Italian; Italian to English. She waved away the dictionary meant for her.
It didn't take long before i got the lay of the land.
She and her husband barely spoke to each other.
To get away from his wife, the husband spent his days on the balcony tending his tomato plants;
and on the weekends escaped with his friends hunting.
The second day she delivered her first scathing put-down.
"Humph. Look at you. you can only speak with verbs.
All the young students i have had spoke in sentences on the second day!"
I shut up.
The second day, she hit closer to he belt.
"Look at you. You have no manners. Look at you cutting your spaghetti!"
Again, I shut up.
How could I explain to her with verbs only that I thought that "slurping my spaghetti without cutting it"
was the height of bad manners!
The third day we both had it.
I had lost my way. I couldn't get back in time for lunch.
Finally, finally, I found her telephone number, got her address, and dragged myself into the apartment.
It ws 3 pm. Lunch was still waiting for me on the table.
And then she let me have it.
'STUPIDO. YOUR HEAD IS ALWAYS IN THE CLOUD!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I was now furious. Abuse is abuse, in English or Italian.
This time it was my turn. And all of a sudden I could use sentences!
I let her have it (including waving my arms!)
"MEI STUPIDO!
"TOI STUPIDO!
"TUTTI MONDO STUPIDO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" (The whole world is stupid!)
DEAD SILENCE.
And then, to my stunned amazement, something I had never yet seen her do,
A smile spread slowly on her face.
And with her eyes sparkling with murderous delight, and waving her arms, she yelled out,
E VERO E VERO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's true! It's true!"
We were friends!!!!!!
The dictionaries were now taken out.
And together we played tourist in the beautiful old "square in the round" in Sienna for the rest of the week!
